One of the hardest things I go through in life is moving forward. Leaving friends, leaving home, leaving school -- abandonment. This isn't a cry for help, but more of the deevolution of my brain. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I've definitely become less social and more content with my surroundings and my experiences.. A sort of zen-esque experience, if you will.
When I first came to California, I wanted to meet everyone around me and try new things all the time, but now that my life is at the cornerstone of moving forward again, it seems that these things are all the things I don't want to do. Maybe, I'm lacking the proper motivation to get me out of my towel lifestyle. Maybe, I still feel like I'm in school. Or maybe, I just don't give a damn about getting ahead anymore.
The people that I'm surrounded by; the life that I live; my nonexistent job.. This is my safe haven.. my royal throne.. my loves.. my legacy.. I can't grow up, even if I have all the tools to do so. When I was a little kid, all I wanted to do was grow up and do whatever my little heart desired (my AIM screen name was dasuntheman26, lol). But now that I'm a fledgling adult, all I wish for is being a kid again -- dasunthekid26.